deKay's Gaming Diary

Still Alive DS is a freeware game you can run on your DS if you have one of those evil, obviously only used for piracy, flash cards. Like an R4 or something. It’s a 2D sort-of remake of Portal, featuring the same sorts of puzzles, turrets, cubes and plasma balls, as well as the two-portal gameplay.

It’s a bit fiddly to control, and it doesn’t look all that amazing, but it’s a solid, clever puzzler. Unfortunately, I’ve now come to an impass, being totally unable to complete the level I’ve reached (29, I think). There’s a narrow shaft I have to fall down, but there’s a plasma ball bouncing back and forth in it, and I can’t time the drop to miss it. Bah.

If you want to play it yourself, you can find it here.

Advanced is too hard.

FACT.

Bah.

That’s two games in one day! Amazing!

After test 18, you managed to escape from the testing chambers, although I won’t say how or what happens afterwards, but when you finally defeat the end of game boss (with hilarious running commentary from the boss itself), you get the credits.

Credits with the best ending song ever. Which I can’t say as it’s a spoiler. But AMAZING.

And! CAKE! Yay!

No, I have no idea why the “The Orange Box” box goes pink when you resize it to the thumbnail you see on the left. Most odd.

Since I don’t want to complete Mario Galaxy too quickly, I’ve decided to play something else for a bit. Yeah, I know I have Phantom Arsegas and Shadow of a Colostomy on the go at the moment, but, well, this arrived yesterday and everyone says it’s ace and I’m weak.

What I don’t remember anyone saying, however, is how hilarious it is. The computer voice taking you through the “training”? Fantastic! The fake concern for me, the lies, the promises of cake! It’s brilliant.

And the game? Braneaching. Yes, that’s a word. I just wrote it, so it must be.

If you don’t know what it entails, then imagine a gun that fires holes that stick to walls, floors and ceilings. One hole is blue, the other, orange. Walk through one, and you come out the other. Easy! But there are puzzles, you see, and they make your brain melt.

And I’m only on puzzle 17!