Play Want Bin Expense: 2017-06-19

Adventureless adventure.

Hot, isn’t it? Too hot to go outside. Best stay indoors in the dark playing video games.

Play

Grand Theft Auto V (PS4)
That Trevor is a bit, er, affected. Isn’t he? Within seconds of taking control of him he stamped on a man’s head until he was dead. Lovely bloke. No, wait. The other thing. I’m actually not enjoying playing as him at all, so spent a while finding things to jump off on a bike. That, and I took him as far north and out to sea as the game would let me, then this happened:

Oh Trevor what a shame.

Lego City Undercover (Switch)
Crashing six times an hour is really, really making this hard to play. It seems a lot more stable in levels, when replaying in Free Play mode, but in the open world bit I’m getting 15 minutes, tops, before a crash. I don’t lose much progress, but having to load the game again each time is a pain.

Unravel (PS4)
Which I completed, and wrote a lot more about here. It was lovely.

Nekopara Vol. 0 (PC)
A visual novel about catgirls. I think. Literally nothing happens, you have no control over the non-events, and it was uncomfortable playing. How old are these catgirls? What does their “master” use them for? Who is their master anyway? Why did I waste 45 minutes completing this? All these questions, and more, to go unanswered for the rest of eternity.

Murder Dog IV: Trial of the Murder Dog (PC)
And then there’s this nonsensical pile of I don’t know what. Far more entertaining and interesting (and less worrying) than Nekopara, though. I completed this too, twice, although didn’t get the best ending. I did, however, murder the jury in the trial. Incredible.

Minecraft: Story Mode (PS4)
In which I completed the first four episodes. It isn’t a terrible game, despite the story not interesting me. I’m not into Minecraft, so that might be why. This wouldn’t normally kill a game, but the story pretty much is the game. Unlike previous Telltale Games adventures, there’s no actual game. Almost no puzzles, for starters – unless you count those you are literally told the answer to, or those that are literally “pull all these levers”. The majority of the time is spent doing QTEs, which really isn’t what I want in a graphical adventure game.

Want

Sonic Mania (Switch)
Fire Emblem Warriors (Switch)
Mario Odyssey (Switch)
Golf Story (Switch)
Lego Marvel Super Heroes (Switch)
Metroid II: Samus Returns (3DS)

Bin

Hands. Games that aren’t and aren’t fun even though they aren’t. Games that crash all the time.

Expense

£10 on 7 Skylanders (for Skylanders Superchargers).
£15 on HYRULE WARRIORS LEGENDS (3DS) because I wanted a second copy.

Play Want Bin Expense: 2017-06-12

E3 to be whatever I
Whatever I choose
And I’ll sing the blues if I want

Oh, E3 started? Or rather, the Pre-E3 stuff did. PrE3. Or something. Only seen Ubisoft and Microsoft presentations so far and… meh.

Play

Lego City Undercover (Switch)
Much as I love this game, I think I’m going to have to stop playing. For some reason, even though it was relatively bug-free when playing two player story mode, now we’re “free roaming” it crashes every ten minutes. And that’s not even an exaggeration – the game will lock up 5 or 6 times an hour, requiring a restart. It’s becoming unbearable and incredibly frustrating. It seems the main trigger is using the scanner, but it isn’t exclusive to that. Shame.

Unravel (PS4)
Unravel was very cheap many months ago, and I bought it then. I played the first level, enjoyed it, then didn’t touch it for no specific reason. I started playing it again this weekend and it is very lovely indeed. I think I’ve two levels left, although I’m hoping there are a few more because I don’t really want it to finish just yet!

Grand Theft Auto V (PS4)
Somewhat late to the party, especially since I bought it ages ago, I started GTAV now Assassin’s Creed Syndicate is out of the way. Wow is there a lot of swearing. Like, a lot. I know it’s GTA and all but good grief. And the N word in every sentence. It doesn’t bother me, but it was still a shock. Anyway, the game itself is fun. Or would be, if I played the game itself. Instead, I’m Taking Bikes Where Bikes Don’t Go (a perennial GTA favourite), Driving On The Train Tracks, and Stealing Tractors. The GTA Playground is excellent. Story? Yeah, I’ll do that eventually. Once I’ve photographed all the toilets.

Want

Nothing at E3 thus far has tempted me. In fact, the footage from Assassin’s Creed Origins has actually put me off a bit. So I’m still here with Sonic Mania (Switch) and Golf Story (Switch). Oh, and Lego Marvel Super Heroes 2 (Switch) because it looks incredible.

Bin

Much of E3’s output so far. Am I getting old, or are games homogenising in to something generic and dull? They all look the same.

And my hands, of course.

Expense

79p on the bottom tier of the Humble Sekai Project Bundle.

My Nintendo, Again

When you gonna give to me, a gift to me
Is it just a matter of time, Nintendo?

Last year, I commented on how useless the then-recent My Nintendo Rewards scheme was. I said back then:

Quickly, I racked up enough of these new coins to buy the Zelda Picross game from the My Nintendo Rewards page, which was pretty good, and I looked forward to obtaining more free games like this.

But they never came. And they haven’t since. In fact, the situation has become even worse.

Since last year, the Nintendo Switch has come out. If you tie your Switch account to your My Nintendo account, you can accumulate Gold Coins with every Switch game purchase – even physical titles. You also now have more ways to “earn” Platinum Coins, if you play mobile titles like Mario Run or Fire Emblem Heroes (which I don’t, incidentally).

Sadly, there’s still nothing to buy with any of these coins. Some money off games that 1) I already have, and 2) are often still cheaper elsewhere. Today, I received an email from Nintendo telling me there were some new “Just For You” deals, presumably just for me. How kind! Looking at the offerings, I see I can get The Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Seasons for my 3DS at a discount. That would be great, only I already bought it on the eShop years ago on the very account already tied to my My Nintendo account. Not only that, but it was cheaper then than it is now even with the discount. In addition, I bloody completed it again just three days ago.

Furthermore, over the months, my “coins” – which I can’t spend, remember – have been expiring. I’ve lost over 6000 Platinum points so far. Sure, I could have spent them getting a copy of Picross e3 or e4 slightly cheaper but guess what? I already have them. Come the end of the month, another 500 Platinum Coins disappear, unspent, and in October my Gold coins start expiring too.

It’s a rubbish system, Nintendo. Why can’t you just give us some NES games for a few hundred coins? Or a generic “10% off the eShop” voucher? There’s no point offering me money off stuff I already have and literally can’t buy again even if I wanted to as you can only have one copy per account! Sort it out.

Play Want Bin Expense: 2017-06-05

This is the end, my only friend, the end. Of some games.

I completed some games! Seems like ages since I did that last, although probably isn’t.

Play

Lego City Undercover (Switch)
Certainly not 100%ed, yet, but we completed the story. As I’ve said elsewhere, it’s the same game as it was on the Wii U. But it’s even better because it’s two player. Sure, that’s bodged into it, but it’s more fun. In addition, mopping up all the collectables and stuff is much quicker when you can split up. Also, ramming my daughter’s car into the sea never gets old.

The Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Seasons (3DS)
And that’s both the Oracles games done! Not only that, but I went on to defeat Twinrova and Not-Quite-Ganon too. It seemed easier than last time I played them, but that was a long time ago. Whatever, though, I still maintain these are the best Zelda games. Breath of the Wild is excellent, Oracle of Ages/Seasons is/are better.

Assassin’s Creed Syndicate (PS4)
Yes I am still playing this, thanks for asking. Currently 50+ hours in, 93%-ish completed. The main things I’ve been doing this week have been completing the Darwin and Dickens side missions, and beating all the Fight Club and race events. I’ve still a few races left to go, mind. And can I find the last Royal Correspondence letter? Can I hell.

Fast RMX (Switch)
It dawned on me I’d not played this since Switch launch day. I played it some more. I unlocked a few more tracks or races or something. Then I put it away again. I think if I liked F-Zero and/or Wipeout, then I’d like it more. It isn’t bad by any measure, but it’s not really my sort of game.

Want

All the same things. Which include, but probably isn’t exclusive to, Sonic Mania (Switch) and Golf Story (Switch).

Bin

Nothing game related.

Expense

Nothing this week!

Play Want Bin Expense: 2017-05-30

No YOU’RE a day late. Also, bank holiday.

That’s right, because I’m counting the Bank Holiday Monday as last week. No, I didn’t do that last time. No, I don’t care what you think.

Play

Assassin’s Creed Syndicate (PS4)
One day, I will be rid of this game, but not just yet. The other night I spent two whole hours searching for just a single chest in the World War I area of the map. Two hours. To find one chest. Ubi are really pushing the limits of fun there, I think. I’ve also finished all the Karl Marx missions. The final one of those can do one though. You have to kidnap four guys without the others seeing you. Only two of them are facing each other. If either spots you, Marx is shot. In the end I just killed them all from the rooftops, and that seemed to work.

Lego City Undercover (Switch)
Such a great game. One of my favourite bits was enduring all the terrible Arnold Schwarzenegger film reference puns in the construction site level. Some incredible levels of punnery on show there. Especially the Conan one. Additionally, it’s hard to understate just how much two player mode adds to the game, even if it is a bit shoehorned in and makes no sense in terms of the story.

The Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Seasons (3DS)
With five dungeons complete, I’m past the half-way point now. Note to self (and anyone else who intends to play this or Oracle of Ages): don’t stop playing. Take a few days off, and you’ll be totally lost. I did that, and had to use a guide to figure out just what the hell I’d been doing last time. Back on track now though.

Disgaea 5 (Demo) (Switch)
Look. The gameplay is just fine. It’s a polished turn based SRPG and from what I can see there’s nothing there to break it. I’d definitely enjoy it. But, and I’m frankly surprised at myself for saying this, the art style is terrible. Cutscenes and profile art is no issue, but the characters in the game look and act like a nasty Flash game. It just doesn’t fit. It shouldn’t matter, especially to me, but I can’t get past it.

Want

Sonic Mania (Switch), of course. But straight out of nowhere comes Golf Story (Switch) which looks just like a Mario-less GBA Mario Golf might. And GBA Mario Golf is incredible.

Bin

Hands. You read my post about being shocked with electricity several hundred times, right? That, then.

Also Disgaea’s art style.

Expense

Rising Storm (PC) – free on Humble Bundle
Bonanza Bros (MD) – traded it for a duplicate copy of a DS game
Lego Star Wars: The Force Awakens (PS4) – present
Hitman HD Trilogy (360) – £2

Play Want Bin Expense: 2017-05-22

Solve ALL the murders

Yes, I know I haven’t posted much other stuff recently. But these are fun, right? Right?

Play

Assassin’s Creed Syndicate (PS4)
I completed it last week, but I’m still playing through, collecting stuff, solving murders, that sort of thing. Evie is stupidly overpowered now, though.

Picross e7 (3DS)
Completed, finally! Turned out it wasn’t quite as long as I was expecting, but £4.50 for not-far-off 30 hours of picross? That’s a bargain. Now the wait for Picross e8 begins, I suppose.

The Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Seasons (3DS)
Only a little of this recently. I’ve finished off the third dungeon, which played out strangely as the mid-boss was almost immediately before the end boss. Perhaps I did something wrong, or broke a sequence, or something? Both were very easy. I’m now back in that weird underworld place looking for — I don’t actually know. I think I’m lost.

Lego City Undercover (Switch)
This is so good. In two player mode, it’s even better than it was on the Wii U, although having Chase McCain as both players is a bit “realism breaking”. Yes, I know it’s a game, and it’s all Lego, but even in-game it doesn’t make any sense. Luckily, it also doesn’t matter. I think we’re about 5 hours in, and on chapter 5 or 6.

Want

Stuff! I want Sonic Mania (Switch) of course, but I’ve actually got quite a few games to get through right now so I think I’m OK for a bit!

Bin

Fingers. Again. Other than that, nothing really. The battery in my phone? It lasts 20 minutes tops now.

Expense

Imagine my surprise when I stumbled across an actual bargain in Game – a copy of Chibi-Robo: Zip-Lash (3DS) complete with Chibi-Robo amiibo. New. For £9.99.

Less surprising, is the secondhand copy for £24.99, and the secondhand copy without the amiibo for £27.99. I didn’t get them.

Play Want Bin Expense: 2017-05-15

Switch? What Switch?

Two weeks in one! It’s a bonus double episode! (Or I’m lazy and/or forgot)

Play

Assassin’s Creed Syndicate (PS4)
I wrote a lot more about it here, when I completed it, but in brief: It’s great, I really liked it, there are bugs, I’ll play it more even though the story is done, there’s no end of game sequence which is odd, and I’m now looking forward to Assassin’s Creed Origins. Assuming that’s the final name, which it possibly isn’t.

Picross e7 (3DS)
Some 23 hours in now, and still less than half finished. That’s skewed a bit though, as a quirk of mine is to generally do the harder puzzles first, and the easiest puzzles when I don’t have much time. This means most of the puzzles that aren’t yet done are in the middle somewhere. Oh, and I’ve finished the micross and bonus puzzles, so perhaps I’m closer to finished than I thought.

The Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Seasons (3DS)
Because after finishing Oracle of Ages, of course I was going to make a start on this. I’m up to the third dungeon (I think), and it’s great. But then I knew that. I’m right about it being more combat-based than Oracle of Ages was too.

Want

One of the things I was going to mention was Lego City Undercover (Switch) again, but I got that this morning! I still want/need Sonic Mania (Switch) though, and having had a brief play of Blaster Master Zero (Switch) I think I want that too. And Assassin’s Creed Origins (PS4).

Bin

Fingers, still. They were less sore last week. They’re awful again today. Sigh. As for games, nothing really.

Expense

Lost Odyssey (360) – £2
New Art Academy (3DS) – £3
Metrico+ (Mac) – Free
Lego City Undercover (Switch) – Present
Paper Mario Colour Splash (Wii U) – Present

Alphabest: GameCube – L

L is for Les Dennis

Was it worth the lengthy wait for L? Without wishing to spoil it for you before we even begin, after recent letters, a definite yes. Yes it was.

L

But before we get onto that, there’s the important task of shunning a handful of wrestling games. Because unless they’re Fire Pro, Cutie Suzuki, or the arcade Wrestlemania game that I used to play sometimes, they ain’t winning nothing. Toodle-oo, Legends of Wrestling and Legends of Wrestling II.

Adieu aussi to some licenced tat: Looney Tunes: Back in Action, and Lemony Snicket’s A Series of Unfortunate Events. Actually, Lemony Snicket isn’t as terrible as you might suspect, but I have no fondness for the source material and as you’ll see, there are far worthier contenders to come.

Three Lord of the Rings games get the chop too. Two of them are middling-to-average hacky-slashy titles which, if it wasn’t for the licence, wouldn’t even get a second glance. The third is a middling-to-average role playing title, which, if it wasn’t for the licence, wouldn’t even get a second glance.

The Legend of Spyro: A New Beginning is an arrogantly named platformer. Spyro is not, and never was, any sort of legend. Like the other Spyro titles, this is dull, generic and bland. Bets thing Spyro ever did? Appear in Skylanders. That tells you a lot about Spyro.

There were two (count ’em) Lego Star Wars games for the GameCube. At the time, I didn’t like them. I don’t know why. The repetitive gameplay, the lack of interest in Star Wars, or the bugs? Later, I came to love the Lego games series, but these were not the best and aren’t fondly remembered. Even though I did 100% one of them.

So that’s what’s not. But what’s not not? What?

lost kingdomsLost Kingdoms came at a time when the GameCube really needed a role-playing game. But did it need this one? Well, no. But it was something different, meshing RPG dungeon-crawling with a real-time card battling mechanic. It took some getting used to, but get this: it’s by FromSoftware. Where are they now, eh? There was a Lost Kingdoms II, but sadly, it wasn’t as good.

zelda wind wakerThe Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker is the best Zelda game on the GameCube. Aside from re-releases, which don’t count. Sure, it was unfinished. Certainly there was a lot of pointless boating and some horrible stealth sections. But those colours! Those facial expressions! That art style! I’m no big fan of 3D Zeldas, but as 3D Zeldas go, this was pretty special. Twilight Princess? Snore.

luigi's mansionLuigi’s Mansion is the GameCube launch title nobody knew they wanted. Disappointed by no actual Mario game, many ignored Luigi’s Mansion for obvious reasons, but as it turns out, it was fantastic. No other game before it had such a well developed atmosphere, as you explore a mansion solving puzzles and hoovering up ghosts. Sure, it was 90% Luigi humping furniture, but it was clever and different and it was a shame it took over a decade before we got a sequel (on the 3DS).

And the Alphabest?

You know, I’d probably put Lego Star Wars II in shortlist if I expanded it to four entries, but then where would the madness end? Not that it’s the Alphabest, of course. Just a comment.

The best L game for the GameCube is obvious. Luigi’s Mansion was a surprise, did something new, and – importantly – didn’t have tedious boating sections. Wind Waker was alright, but Luigi was best. And not just because of his scared “Mari-oooooo?” sound clips.

Next time, whenever that might be, I’ll tackle M. Mmmm, M.