Moo Moo Move (Steam Deck): COMPLETED!

Jeff Minter tooted about this free game on Steam so I thought I’d have a look. It’s a very simple cow herding arcade game (so probably right up Jeff’s street) with about 20 levels. Some levels have bulls that interfere with your rounding up, some have aliens that try to abduct your cows, as aliens are wont to do, and some have snipers with tranquilisers that put your cows to sleep. It’s not very hard, although getting 3 stars (i.e. …

The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom (Switch): COMPLETED!

What’s this, you say? It’s been over a month since I completed anything? You thought I was dead? Well, no! Turns out that Tears of the Kingdom is Quite Large and so it has taken me 95 hours to complete it. Which, across a month, is about three hours a day. That’s fine, right? There’s a lot to talk about regarding the game. For example, a number of people complained that it’s just using the same overworld as Breath of …

Doctor Who: An Unlikely Heist (iPad): COMPLETED!

This is a bad game. Do not play. You want more? Sigh. Fine. Doctor Who: An Unlikely Heist, which was renamed in an update to “Doctor Who: Hidden Mysteries” presumably because there was no unlikely heist in the game, is a hidden object game. I’ve no beef with hidden object games. They can be fun but they are very shallow, and usually, that’s fine. However, it’s not just a hidden object game because there’s a tenuous Doctor Who story here …

Nebulus (Evercade): COMPLETED!

It’s not often I play the C64 version of a game I liked on the Spectrum (and in this case, the Game Boy too) and think, you know, this is actually better. But it is. The animation of your main frog/gonk guy especially is really nice, and the vertical scrolling is less jerky. it’s great. And hard. Very hard. Previously, I don’t think I’d ever even passed level 2, so I’d not experienced how much of a mind-stewing maze the …

Dude, Where Is My Beer? (Switch): COMPLETED!

Before I start on the game itself, I wish to lodge a complaint. It isn’t about the game itself, and doesn’t affect the game itself, but it is something important and also something I’ve taken issue with before. Dude, Where Is My Beer? is rated PEGI 3. Right here on the Nintendo eShop: PEGI 3 essentially means suitable for all, and isn’t actually that common as any mild language, violence (even cartoon violence), skimpy clothing or most sorts of peril …

Planet TD (Steam Deck): COMPLETED!

Planet TD is a pretty simple, no frills Tower Defen[c|s]e game. I don’t remember how I ended up with it on Steam, or why I started playing it, but it’s… fine? I mean, it’s straightforward. You have loads of levels, and on each you put different types of gun towers down on set locations before a load of baddies march along a set path and you have to make sure your guns kill them before they reach the end of …

Azure Striker Gunvolt 3 (Switch): COMPLETED!

I found out recently that there are no plans to create any more Gunvolt games. Or Blaster Master Zero games. This is a Bad Occurrence, because I very much like them both. What exactly are Inti Creates going to do instead? Anyway, this game. It’s a bit different to the previous Gunvolt game, in that you don’t play as Gunvolt. Well, not really. Instead, you play as Kirin, a sort of ninja monk who makes use of some of Gunvolt’s …

Wardner (Evercade): COMPLETED!

Although it wasn’t often I came across Wardner in the arcades, it was a game I played whenever I got the chance. I don’t know why though, because it’s so hard my ten pee would last mere seconds. Now, with the advent of Press Select to Insert Coin, I can just slot unlimited magic money into the machine! The future! Playing it now, I realise that it’s actually quite a lot like Alex Kidd. No janken, of course, and you …

Cybernoid (Evercade): COMPLETED!

This week, the next two Evercade cartridges arrived. Cybernoid is on the new C64 cart, and I was a big fan of the original (albeit on the Spectrum) so it’s the first thing I started up. Thankfully, the Commodore version is very similar to the Spectrum one, although with more muted colours and a different ship design. It’s still a pretty good game, although it’s very easy to die due to the random nature of some of the spawns. For …

Kid Chameleon (Switch): COMPLETED!

It’s been a while, but with it recently popping up on the Switch Online service, I gave it another go. This time, I’d remembered how damn difficult it was, but even so, a few later levels (especially one which was an autoscroller) are properly brutal. Yes, I used save states. You have to, and not even because it is difficult – it’s just so, so long and there aren’t any built-in save options or passwords or anything. All you can …

Gunvolt Chronicles: Luminous Avenger iX 2 (Switch): COMPLETED!

I do like me a Gunvolt. Luminous Avenger iX plays a little differently, being a spin-off, and this sequel continues that way, but the Mega Man-ish roots are still there and as platform shooters go, the series is probably my favourite. iX 2 involves yer boy Copen and some of his chums getting sucked into a parallel dimension where humans have died out and robots guard a huge tower. For story based reasons, the mission is to scale this tower …

Sackboy: A Big Adventure (PS5): COMPLETED!

I talked about this a lot more on the ugvm Podcast, but for those who don’t listen (who even are you?), here’s a written account instead. Firstly, I want to point how how bad I thought the Little Big Planet games are. As toyboxes, as creation tools – they’re great. Clunky, but great. As actual platformers? Awful. Some really great ideas, totally ruined by stupid controls and physics and wonkiness. For this reason, I never even looked at Sackboy: A …

The Procession to Calvary (Switch): COMPLETED!

One question I’m sure you often ask yourself, is what would a point and click adventure game animated by Terry Gilliam look like? It’s something I’ve certainly pondered hundreds of times, and now there’s a conclusive answer: The Procession to Calvary. Mechanically, it’s “just another adventure game” in the style of Monkey Island or Sam & Max. The humour is veering that way too, via Monty Python. But graphically, it’s like nothing else I’ve ever played. You see, all the …

Superhot (Steam Deck): COMPLETED!

Yes, yes. I’m late to the party. I know. And no, I have no excuse because I’ve owned it on Steam for ages, and it’s been on PS+ seemingly forever. But I’m here now, and that’s all that counts, right? And, as it turns out, Superhot is bloody excellent. The “things only move when you do” mechanic is so obvious now that you wonder why it wasn’t really done before, and here it turns a first person shooter into a …

Biomutant (PS5): COMPLETED!

I do wonder sometimes what it is that makes me decide to play certain games. I’d cast a rough eye over reviews of Biomutant around the time it came out and it seemed to be an average open world adventure/explorey game, so ignored it. It’s now on PS+ (or possibly PS++ or PS+++: It’s hard to tell these days) and I downloaded it for reasons unknown, then started to play it. After picking the fur colours for my… rat? Meerkat? …