Kimono Cats is a very bad game. That’s it. That’s the post. Oh, you want a reason? Tch. Don’t you trust me? Ridiculous. Fine. Reasoning: You know those terrible mobile telephone games where you can only progress if you grind the same repetitive tasks over and over again, for no real reward, unless you pay for in-game currency with real-world money? Well, this is one of those games, only without any of the real-world money purchases, because it’s on Apple …
Many, many moons ago, I bought the original version of this on my iPhone. It was great. In fact, I still have it and my development company (Ubisocks) is still going and is on year 300 or something. Recently, a modified version was released on Apple Arcade as Game Dev Story+. I’m not sure what is actually modified, aside from a different coloured icon, but it doesn’t matter because it meant I could restart the game without losing my more-than-a-decade-long …
I discovered that, since they added an Apple app to my TV, I could actually Airplay my iPhone screen on there, and with a PS4 controller connected via Bluetooth, I basically have another console. And then, Apple gave me another free month of Apple Arcade. And then, I spotted Nuts on there, when I was about to buy it for the Switch. So here we are. Nuts follows you, as a squirrel researcher, setting up cameras with which to watch …
Look at this. I have not only completed a telephone game, but it was a telephone game that I had to buy with actual money. How rare. So rare, in fact, I don’t think I’ve done that in years. I gave up on the whole iOS game market ages ago as it was full of clones, IAPs and rubbish. Lifeline was recommended by the Midnight Resistance podcast, and sounded interesting. So I bought it. Remember text adventures? It’s a simple …
I’ve not just been completing things, you know… Johnny Kung Fu (3DS) I was really looking forward to this when it was announced. Reviews were not kind, but I thought – they’re wrong, right? They were not wrong. Sure, it’s not terrible. And, separately, each level is fine. The problem is the game is a confused mess of Game & Watch, Kung Fu Master, and Wario Ware and it doesn’t really gel properly. Oh well. Marvel Pinball 3D (3DS) It’s …
Mutant Mudds (3DS) It’s really hard now. I’ve done all 16 main levels, some of the secret levels, and collected all of the diamonds so far. I’ve done the first three Moon levels, but the last one? Nightmare. It’s so difficult! It doesn’t help that you can only have one power up at a time, and you really need all three to make it through. I’ve swapped around which ones I’ve been using, but it’s too hard with any of …
Haven’t had an update post in a while, and I’ve been trying out lots of different games over the last couple of weeks and not made mention of them here, so here’s a roundup: Say What You See (iOS) A series of pictures with hidden clues to game titles, films, etc. Like a cross between Where’s Wally? and a cryptic crossword. There are number of “canvases”, and I’ve been playing the Arcade Games one. Completed it, but some of them …
Lets just gloss over the fact there was a Need For Speed: Hot Pursuit game, and a sequel, about 10 years ago and get on to the rubbishing of the new one, yes? It’s rubbish. To be more specific, it’s a dull Chase HQ clone with awful stuttering problems (the game would pause for 5 seconds or more, sometimes!), a seemingly pointless handbrake turn (that rarely works anyway) and terrible rubber-banding. I played the first 6 events, didn’t really enjoy …
The Rev had pointed out that this was excellent. I wasn’t so sure, since I loved the 360 version and a move to a 2D, controller-less version didn’t seem like it would work. If only he’d said “It’s like ‘Run!’, only better”, I’d have bought it like a shot. As it is, The Rev died this week. Also this week, EA had a sale on the App Store, and Mirror’s Edge was reduced to 59p, so in some strange, possibly …
Er, hurrah? I think? I’ll write more about the game itself at a later date when I’m in a more ranty, wordy mood, but needless to say it wasn’t great. There were great bits, and the idea was mostly sound, but the wrong physics and totally not-Sonic feel to it (despite visually being a clone of previous (better) Sonic titles just broke it. But I’ve completed it now. Sans emeralds, but the Special Stage is too ridiculous to attempt any …
Yes, I realise that not only have I already completed Peggle on both the iPod (nano) and Xbox 360, but completed Peggle Nights first despite being DLC. Anyway. It’s just Peggle. Again. And it’s as great as it ever was. And now I’ve completed it. Again. I’m not really sure what else there is to say?
I said I wouldn’t buy it. I wasn’t going to buy it. I really didn’t want to buy it. Really. But of course, I did. Rubbish. But is it actually any good? Could it be a surprise? In many ways, it does a lot right. Like, very right. Splash Hill, for instance – it’s ace. First level of Lost Labyrinth? Excellent. Mad Gear 3? Lovely. But some of it, like the nonsense of “get 100,000 points!” in Casino Nig^H^H^HStreet 2, …
Since I’d never played Peggle Nights, but have completed Peggle on both the iPod Nano and XBLA, I thought I’d play Nights first. And… it’s just Peggle. Only with different levels. After a couple of days play (doing levels here and there) I completed it. There’s not a lot to say, really, except that as before, it’s addictive and frustrating in equal measure. And is only 59p! Er, so long as you’ve already bought Peggle (which was also 59p) of …
T’other day, there was a big sale on the App Store, with loads of iPhone games reduced to 59p and £1.19. S:TSOBM was one of those, and I bought it. And so it came to pass, it was the second iPhone game I completed! Took about 3 hours in total, I’d say. Yes, I could have done it quicker, but I tried to get every insect on every level, so it took longer. So there. Perhaps I should explain the …
